The Clock is Ticking...

I can't sleep. I have been tossing and turning, in and out of bed. I am anxious.

I lay in bed for awhile watching Craig sleep. And I realize that the time I have with him is scarce. I'm counting the days now. 24 days. Each minute, hour, day passes my heart sinks and I feel like a tiny piece of me is being chipped away until I'm nothing. I watched him sleep and my tears started to flow. When the 24 days are up, I won't be able to feel him next to me or hear him snore (and boy, does he snore!). I have nobody to cook for. Nobody to make me french toast, pancakes, or burgers (yes, he has added more entrees to his food repetoire! slowly but surely). Nobody to laugh with the way I laugh with him.

Last week, Craig reminded me we only have four weeks together. His eyes welled up and was in tears. I didn't feel it back then and didn't really understand why he was so melancholy.

Now it's only 3.

It really isn't fair.