The Four Stages

There are four stages to culture shock and living abroad...

1) The honeymoon stage

Symptoms of the honeymoon stage:

-Excitement and euphoria
-General anticipation of everything that you are about to experience
-Everything and everyone you encounter is new and many times exciting
-You’ll probably be eager to learn the language spoken in your host country During the honeymoon stage you will be poised to take on the challenges of living broad.

Examples of my honeymoon stage:
Grim Reminder of Home
Diamond in the Rough

2) Frustration Stage

After the honeymoon stage your initial excitement may wane. You also may start to feel frustration; this is the onset of the frustration stage. Frustration can occur for various reasons.

Symptoms of the frustration stage:

-Some of your initial excitement dissipates
-Feelings of anxiety, anger and homesickness creep in
-You might reject your new environment and begin to have a lack of interest in your new surroundings
-You’ll become frustrated with trying to speak a foreign language

Examples of my frustration stage:

The Irony of the Peacline
The Day After
No Cake
Royal Mail vs. USPS
What I Miss About San Francisco

3) Understanding Stage

The understanding stage arrives when you develop a more balanced view of your experience abroad.

Characteristics of the understanding stage

-You become more familiar with the culture, people, food and language of your host country
-You will have made friends
-You become less homesick
-You’ll be more comfortable with speaking and listening to the language spoken in your host country
-You become more comfortable and relaxed in your new environment
-You better handle the situations you previously found frustrating

I think I have reached the Understanding Stage. I have been thinking about where Craig and I should move permanently. I know before I wanted us to live in San Francisco but then I've got to thinking about how we will both benefit for our future and what is best for us and our family in the long run (socially, financially, etc). I have been weighing the pros and cons between the UK and America. I realize it is inconvenient here, but people have seemed to survive without satiating their sundae cravings at 2am when everything is closed. I mean do I really need a sundae at that hour? Don't think so. Yes, the royal mail drives me up the wall, but in reality, I wouldn't be dealing with them on a daily basis. My statement, "You are not allowed to get sick after 5:30PM and Sundays because the pharmacy is closed." As I think about it, it can wait until tomorrow when the pharmacy is open, if it can't then you can go to the ER. It's free ANYWAY!!!! Well not exactly free, you pay health tax but at least you won't be charged $200 just for walking through the doors of the ER, and whatever they add on the tab like lab tests/xrays as they do in America. These are little things I have mentioned (healthcare isn't exactly little), and I can easily get over it.

So...I am vascillating and can't make up my mind. The pros and cons are still circling in my head. I haven't been sleeping well for the past few days because there is too much on my mind. Thinking about the aforementioned, counting down the days when I have to leave my soulmate for a long while, and prepping/researching the visa process in both countries. I feel so overwhelmed.

But I digress. I almost forgot about the last stage...

4) Acclimation Stage

During the acclimation stage you will begin to feel like you really belong in your new environment.

Characteristics of the acclimation stage

-You’ll be able to compare the good and bad of your host country with the good and bad of your home country
-You feel less like a foreigner and more like your host country is your second home
-You laugh about things that frustrated you at earlier stages of cultural shock
-Once you reach the acclimation, you’ll have the satisfaction of knowing that you -can live successfully in two cultures; this is a huge milestone.

Obviously, I haven't gotten to this stage yet and I won't be here long enough to experience this stage. Maybe someday perhaps. ;)

The Clock is Ticking...

I can't sleep. I have been tossing and turning, in and out of bed. I am anxious.

I lay in bed for awhile watching Craig sleep. And I realize that the time I have with him is scarce. I'm counting the days now. 24 days. Each minute, hour, day passes my heart sinks and I feel like a tiny piece of me is being chipped away until I'm nothing. I watched him sleep and my tears started to flow. When the 24 days are up, I won't be able to feel him next to me or hear him snore (and boy, does he snore!). I have nobody to cook for. Nobody to make me french toast, pancakes, or burgers (yes, he has added more entrees to his food repetoire! slowly but surely). Nobody to laugh with the way I laugh with him.

Last week, Craig reminded me we only have four weeks together. His eyes welled up and was in tears. I didn't feel it back then and didn't really understand why he was so melancholy.

Now it's only 3.

It really isn't fair.

Full of Beans

Finally, a healthclub that won't fill you with empty promises, but will leave you full of beans.

Full of beans = full of energy

Cafe Paul Rankin

Paul Rankin, celebrity chef of Belfast, has a few eating establishments scattered throughout Belfast. Craig and I accidentally stumbled across his cafe, which serves affordable food for the masses.

Craig is so excited, he can't contain himself.

It was a hot and humid today. The last thing we wanted to do was sit inside a stuffy cafe. Unfortunately, seating outside was all full. We decided to sacrafice our discomfort to sample celebrity food Belfast stylie. The place was completely packed but we managed to find a seat. I ordered at the counter and the food was brought to our table. I was surprised the food came as quickly as it did, despite it being very busy.



Craig ordered the Chicken Ceasar Salad and I had the Chef Sandwich, a grilled chicken sandwich w/ roasted red peppers, and pesto served in a bap with chips and salad with a mustard vinagrette. I wasn't really impressed with my meal. The Grilled chicken was very dry, and the pesto wasn't substantial to the sandwich. It was mediocre at best. Craig's dish on the other hand was amazing! It was THE best chicken ceasar salad I have ever had! It was so good that Craig ate in silence. And here I was sitting across him watching him in envy while I ate my dry grilled chicken sandwich. :(

While Craig was devouring his salad, I had the opportunity to witness delinquency close up. Outside, a riot was about to ensue between two patrons fighting over table. A shifty women next to our table was acting very shifty and stole a deli sandwich. She noticed that I noticed and she got up to pretend to order at the queue but turned around and left. The food at Cafe Rankin is good but I wouldn't say it was that good you would commit a crime.

Would I come back to Cafe Paul Rankin again? The answer is definitely yes. Very casual atmosphere. Staff are friendly, attentive and nice. Fast service. Chicken Ceasar, hell yes! Chef Sandwich, hell no!

Food: 5 (for chicken ceasar salad only)
Customer Service: 4
Atmosphere: 3

Well We're Movin' On Up....

to the southside (again). To a deluxe apartment in the sky. We've finally got a piece of the pie!

Bye bye Stranmillis! Hello, Malone Road! Craig's mom scored us a flat last minute. As soon as they got back from Spain, we moved all our stuff out of the Stranmillis house, and moved into the flat. Let me tell ya, it was the fastest move I've ever done in my entire life! And boy we have so much crap! I can't believe I've only been here a few months and I've moved 6 times! From my mother-in-law's house on the Shankill, to Fanore, to Glenwood Avenue, back to my mother-in-law's, to Stranmillis, now Malone Road. I feel like a hobo, a carpetbagger, a travelling gypsy. At least we're moving up instead of down. The Malone Road is regarded as the wealthy part of Belfast.

Although, it seems like I'm revisiting my college hell days, we have this place to ourselves. Nobody walking in on us, no more people freeloading off of us, slamming doors at 3am, no drunken parties or leaving a trail of mess for us to clean. For 4 weeks, it will be just us, the way it should be.

I will miss Stranmillis though. Everything good and bad happened there. It was the place that Craig asked me to spend the rest of my life with him. Let's hope that Malone Road will be an even happier place.

Anyways, I'm knackered. Off to bed!

The Irony of the Peaceline

I find it odd that they close the Peaceline at 10:00PM.

It's rather an inconvenience really. After the Brian Kennedy Concert which was near the Falls Road, we took a taxi home, and because it was 11:30PM, we had to go back into town and around the wall onto the Shankill. What could have taken us 3 minutes to get home, took us 15 minutes because of that stupid wall.

I wonder what would happen if they broke down the Peaceline. Would people celebrate the same way as they did when they broke down the Berlin wall? [Not!]

Something tells me that this wall be up for a very, very, very long time.

Made In Belfast: Brian Kennedy

Tonight Craig and I saw every woman's best gay boyfriend --- Belfast Heartthrob, Brian Kennedy. Brian Kennedy is like the Julio to the Inglesias, the Tom to the Jones. He's got a brilliant voice, he's sexy, and he is flamin'. His claim to fame was when he was discovered by Van Morrison and Brian has been up Van Morrison's ass ever since.

But truly, I really enjoyed his concert despite the fact that Craig went kicking and screaming. For one, Craig was reluctant to take part in Feile an Phobail because it is a Catholic event. And two, Brian Kennedy is a threat to his manhood and thanks to me, Craig is now the laughing stock at his place of work. And between you and me, he really enjoyed the concert too but will not admit it. I saw him sneak a snapshot of the pretty boy. I found it kind of funny that over 97% of the audience were female young and old. Clonard Monastery became a big receptacle of estrogen. I'm sure if the gig wasn't held in the house of God, unmentionables would be thrown on the stage. I was also surprised to see sober durdles so vibrant and having so much fun! There was a lot of audience participation, everyone was singing and clapping. They go nuts for this dude, it was amazing! It was touching to see everyone so into the songs and singing them. It was like being in a pub at a mass scale.


Clonard Monastery is such a beautiful cathedral and it was the perfect place to experience music. The acoustics were sublime and it really complimented Brian Kennedy's voice beautifully. He sang a lot of Van Morrison covers (of course), excellent renditions of Al Greene's 'Let's Stick Together' and Cole Porter's 'Night and Day'. He also sang my favorite song 'Crazy Love' which was featured in the movie, When A Man Loves A Woman, starring Meg Ryan and Andy Garcia. Craig's favorite song was 'Raise You Up'. I recorded some of the songs mentioned above. I will try to post them up, that is if it doesn't sound like crap.

Opening acts were the Feile choir and Eemir Kenny. Emir Kenny is from County Louth. She sounded like Dolores O'Riordan on crack in a forgetful mood. She couldn't remember the words to her own songs. It sounded like she was making it up as she went along. Boy, was she hard to sit through.

Even though I'm not a big fan of Brian Kennedy. I mean I think he is good but it's not like I would buy any of his albums. He has ten albums by the way. Hard to forget since he's mentioned it like 50 times all throughout the concert. It is a once in a lifetime opportunity to see him play in Belfast and in the very place where he as a young altar boy sang in the Clonard Monastery choir. Priceless. You can't get any better than that.

BTW...the guitar that Brian was playing was a Lowden guitar. The very guitar that Craig aka Hop Along fretted meaning he built the frets on the guitar. He was fretting throughout the whole concert because the guitar was screaming 'Daddy'. Get it? Hahaha. Fretting!